MIA – But not really

I really need to post here more often but as it happens for most, real life is getting in the way.

Work makes me exhausted sometimes. I feel like like I hardly have any brain power left for my own projects when I come home. I hope to rectify that.

For those that know me well, you know that I have an anxiety disorder. I’ve been trying to manage that lately. It’s been mostly good, but the bad days are really bad.

I’m still writing when I can and when my own doubts and anxiety doesn’t block me. It’s a constant battle with myself.

Summer is the time of social activities, so I’m gone a lot. This party. That graduation. This birthday. Etc. I also just got back from vacation with my husband. I rarely get to have real time alone with him so that’s been nice.

I also became an aunt. So that’s nice. My new niece is adorable. It makes me want kids even more.

I’m de-cluttering my house. I didn’t know that would take so long but apparently going through stuff and getting rid of it takes time. Also, it’s only the beginning of the list of house improvements I want to do this year.

I hope to be updating more soon. I’m still editing Killer Orange and Mod Fury as well as finishing up a few other short story projects. NaNoWriMo is coming up and I already have an idea for that. I do hope to publish something this year, however. I just need to get off my ass and do it.

Catch up with you all soon! Take care.

H.K. Rowe

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4 thoughts on “MIA – But not really

  1. I know what you mean about real life getting in the way. I haven’t been as busy as you, but my depression and anxiety make it really hard to blog sometimes, so I’m learning to use the time to recuperate without feeling guilty for it. Sorry you’ve had some bad days lately with your own anxiety. That’s never fun, for sure… :/

    That’s great about the vacation, though, as well as your new niece! Glad you’ve had some happy things like that to preoccupy you. Anyway, hope life treats you well, and that you’re able to accomplish heaps with your writing and editing! 🙂

  2. I think I’ve finally come out of my six month (!) depression, and what got me out was this: Instead of *just* focusing on Paradisa, I loaded up my list with books to read, short stories to write, film projects to tinker with, etc. It’s strange, but I find that the more tasks I give myself, the more efficient I am. Especially when those tasks are diverse. On the flipside, realistic goals are important too. I stopped telling myself that I’d write 2-3k a day. If I just take half an hour every day and write 800 words, it builds up quickly….and I still have plenty of time to be a good girlfriend, to take care of chores, to work, to do other stuff, to be social, etc.

    Unfortunately, I don’t know how to beat anxiety. Anxiety is so much more destructive than depression for a creative person, because depression can be defeated with vision – anxiety can only be cured with calm, and how the heck do you self-generate that?

    But I do think that being busy creatively has helped me cope with my work anxiety more lately. It gives me something fun to mull about at work, which keeps my mind off the anxious BS. I think a lot of exhaustion comes from being uninspired and stressed, tbh, but some exhaustion is unavoidable – or else I wouldn’t want a nap every day! So, I guess the key is to accept the limits of your body and creativity and to work around those limits as efficiently as possible. Set your goals with the assumption that your sinuses might crop up and be a dick sometime, or that anxiety could come out of nowhere, or that you don’t plan on accomplishing anything on nights when Arrow comes on – but then resolve to do something great with the functional time you do have.

    • Sorry to hear about your depression. Your thoughts do give me something to consider, like maybe I keep just realistic goals and work on many different things. I do often get bored and frustrated with one thing over and over again.

      I’m not sure how to beat Anxiety either. 🙂 But I more or less have to manage it and embrace it as a part of who I am.

      And good point… I should start planning things with the possibilities of distractions and things interfering. I guess that’s life!

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